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How could the instant classic Caps-Pens series not have reached a Game 7? This has been the most amazing Stanley Cup playoff series I can remember, and it comes to a head tonight at Verizon Center.

This Game 7 is probably the toughest ticket in DC in the past twenty years, and the biggest Caps game since they advanced to the Stanley Cup Finals in the 1997-1998 season. Unfortunately, nobody has stepped up and offered me any tickets, so it looks like I won't be part of the madness at Verizon Center. Instead, I'll be ranting and raving at home, scaring my family in the process with my scraggly beard and red Caps sweater.

Here are my seven keys to a Game 7 Caps victory:

1) Score first - I don't care that the team that has scored first has lost 5 out of the 6 games in the series. The Capitals can't allow the Penguins to get on the board first and neutralize the crowd at Verizon Center. Set the tone early, crowd Pens netminder Marc Andre Fleury, and get a quick first goal.

2) Clear the defensive zone - Too much intricate passing between Caps defensemen in this series that has led to Pittsburgh opportunities; I've seen more 2-on-1's in this series than I care to remember. I'm going to have nightmares about Evgeni Malkin streaking into our zone for the next decade if the Penguins win tonight's game.

3) Outshoot the Pens - Simeon Varlamov has been amazing throughout the series, aside from the Game 4 debacle in Pittsburgh. But he's facing way too many shots, having made 30+ saves in 4 of the 6 games in the series. The Caps need to pepper Fleury throughout the game, especially on the power play. The Caps always seem to try to make that one extra pass for the perfect shot, when they should be putting it toward the net, hoping for a deflection or a putback.

4) Clear out Crosby - I'm getting sick and tired of seeing Sid the Kid score from point-blank range. The Caps teams I grew up watching would NEVER have allowed Crosby to camp out in front of the crease the way he has throughout this series. Do you think Rod Langway, Kevin Hatcher and Scott Stevens would let Crosby establish that sort of position back in the day? He might have gotten away with it once against those guys, but the next time he ventured near the crease, he would be sucking his lunch through a straw for the next month.

5) Need some help from Green and Semin - Alex Ovechkin has clearly done his part, leading the NHL with 20 postseason points, including 10 goals. Guys like David Steckel and Viktor Kozlov have contributed as well, Steckel with 3 goals in the series and Kozlov's 2-goal peformance in Game 6. But Alexander Semin and Mike Green have been invisible against the Pens; Semin has chipped in with 6 assists, but has yet to score after tallying 5 goals in the Rangers series. Mike Green might need to tell Easton to crank out another 500 of those discontinued sticks he racked up 31 goals with in the regular season, since he's notched exactly one more goal than I have in 13 playoff games.

6) Some Home Cooking Would Be Nice - The refs are killing me in this series. They make a ticky-tack hooking call on Nicklas Backstrom and don't call a cross-check to the back of Alex Ovechkin? For the final ten minutes of the third period of Game 6, the zebras had swallowed their whistles, and then they nailed the Caps with a slashing call on Laich with 2:02 left? What an absolute joke...if the Pens get a late power play tonight on some borderline call, I might put a shoe through my 42" HD TV.

7) I guarantee a Penguins victory - There, I just put the Always Bet Against Cakes jinx voodoo on the Pittsburgh Penguins. In case you don't already know, I'm the world's worst gambler, and clearly a jinx, so hopefully that mojo continues with a Caps victory tonight...

LET'S GO CAPS!!!