Separating fact from fiction

Before accepting the yearly challenge of consuming as much food as possible without losing consciousness, please take a moment and try to separate Orioles fact from fiction.

You won't need a carving knife.

Sig Mejdal ranks among the most, yes, significant hires in recent memory.
Fact. And the hire, wait for it, signifies that the Orioles are dead serious about incorporating analytics and taking a vastly different approach moving forward. It isn't just lip service. The former NASA biomathematician is going to, wait for it again, reduce the space between the Orioles and the teams ahead of them.

The Orioles are drawing rave reviews throughout baseball for their first two hires.
Fact. The industry is heaping praise on them, beginning with the decision to bring in Mike Elias as executive vice president and general manager. Fans are positively giddy. No one is predicting a playoff run in 2019, but people seem to love where the club is headed. Love the forward-thinkers joining the organization. We'll find out much later how it turned out, but I haven't noticed this much excitement since the Orioles drafted a local kid from Aberdeen in '78.

We know with 100 percent certainty that Joe Espada is a leading candidate to manage the Orioles.
Fiction. Elias hasn't released a list of names. He hasn't singled out Espada. We're operating strictly on logic by making Estrada any sort of candidate. He worked with Elias in Houston as the bench coach and he's interviewed with four teams in the offseason. Someone is going to hire him as a manager and it might be the Orioles. But we don't know for sure that he's going to interview. We're just assuming. And you know what happens when you assume.

The sides are the best part of a Thanksgiving meal.
Fact. I'd make snow angels in my mother's mashed potatoes and her stuffing is so good that I hide it in the back of the fridge and eat it cold for days. And only the canned cranberry sauce, please. I appreciate your efforts to go the homemade route and add other fruits and nuts and orange zest and foliage from the back yard, but I want mine straight and to jiggle before it's sliced.

Saying "jiggle before it's sliced" is setting up a Sidney Ponson operation joke.
Fiction. That would be beneath me.

Always take the Lions no matter the point spread on Thanksgiving.
Fiction. Though they have a tendency to play better on that day no matter their record. I can cite examples.

Re-signing Jace Peterson to a minor league contract makes no sense.
Fiction. He provides depth in the system, he doesn't take up a spot on the 40-man roster and every team in baseball is making similar moves. It just seems that the Orioles get blasted for them. Or we're told to start printing those playoff tickets.

Suggesting that playoff tickets be printed after every minor acquisition is clever.
Fiction.

The Orioles will participate in the Rule 5 draft on Dec. 13.
Fact. They have the first pick. They're already checking on players left unprotected by other clubs. They won't pass. Sort of like The Citadel's football team.

Mike Elias won't work with Brady Anderson.
Fiction. Elias indicated Monday morning that he's already spoken to Anderson. He's going to tap into Anderson's knowledge of the personnel in the majors and minors. The club values his ability to create and implement workout and nutritional programs, and he proved again in spring training that he could get deals done as negotiations dragged and organizational patience grew thin. How the pitchers performed is a separate matter. He got them under contract. His relationship with agents and executives can come in handy. Perhaps a more clearly defined role would settle down some of his critics.

Catchers Caleb Joseph and Austin Wynns could break camp with the team next spring.
Fact. Joseph is a non-tender candidate because of a projected salary of around $1.7 million, but he still has supporters in the organization who don't consider the free agent market to be ripe with upgrades. They like his work behind the plate. And Wynns certainly can handle a backup role, especially if he doesn't allow the game to speed up on him. Shortstop and pitching depth are bigger priorities. But Elias will make the final call.

Chris Davis could move to third base and allow Trey Mancini to play his natural position.
Fiction. A team with a defense that's been in steady decline needs a plus glove wherever it can find one. Davis can fill in if needed, but on an everyday basis? It doesn't make sense. Wins will continue to elude the Orioles if they can't get back to elite fielding status. If they can't be trusted to continually make the routine plays and support a pitching staff that's also been a weakness. Davis stays at first base or gets more at-bats as the designated hitter, especially if Mark Trumbo opens the season on the disabled list. And Cedric Mullins' range in center field will ease the burden on Mancini.

New Orioles minor league pitcher Jeffeson Medina needs to buy a consonant from infielder Zachary Vincej.
Fiction. You can only buy vowels.